autostraddle.com tumblr presence (Posts tagged autostraddle)

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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
When the ceramic snow village came down from the attic and the tree went up in my living room, everything was going to be okay. Christmas would make it okay. My mom threw dishes, smashed them against the floor and the wall, but she never even chipped her Southern Living Christmas china. My dad wasn’t home very much; he had to travel all the time for work, but he never missed a holiday moment. He chopped down the tree. He untangled the lights. My dad made a “Santa Stops Here” sign for my birthday one time, and he was right: During the regular year, we had to choose between crutches for my broken ankle or cigarettes for my mom, but Santa always gave everyone in my family something so good. My mom bought elves and she bought angels. She displayed them in every nook of our house. Nobody got slapped at Christmas.
Heather Hogan via Hate Actually: Can the Holigays Heal a Gay Grinch’s Heart?
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Since my life has gone zero to a hundred real quick, I have to take care to consider how I started from the bottom. I mean, lord knows, sometimes it’s felt like it’s been all me, forever, when I’ve been up all night, buried alive, on my worst behavior. I don’t know if anyone expected me to come thru and own it, because I’ve been the furthest thing from successful. Sometimes I think I’m doing it wrong, that it’s just practice and I’m never gonna connect with headlines and buy that fancy tuscan leather, have the fireworks and cameras show me a good time. I want to be unforgettable, but I don’t want to be too much. I want them to miss me but not be over me. Mom always said “make me proud” and “find your love,” because she wants me to take care. Now she says “look what you’ve done” because the good ones go and what we think is the calm is just fear. I keep telling myself I just have to hold on, we’re going home and we’ll be fine. Hell ya fucking right, this year is going to be the best I ever had. I’m goin in. Wu-Tang Forever.
Kate wants a Drake shirt this year.
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Get out your ugly sweaters, y'all. It’s time for our annual holigay parties, and we’ve got something for everyone - whether you’re a crafter, karaoke expert, or brunch connoisseur. Check out the official list to find a holigay party near you this...

Get out your ugly sweaters, y'all. It’s time for our annual holigay parties, and we’ve got something for everyone - whether you’re a crafter, karaoke expert, or brunch connoisseur. Check out the official list to find a holigay party near you this month, and don’t forget to share photos and other good stuff this season using the tag #HappyHoligays on social media!

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‘Twas the holigay season, and ‘straddlers all ‘cross the land
knew winter was coming when our holigay content went up as planned.
They organized cute parties for ten, hundreds, or more,
And found present ideas from gift guides galore.

Then somewhere in Slack, there arose such a clatter,
As I got excited for the holidays to matter.
I’ve been ready for this since October started,
And it only got worse as Thanksgiving departed.
In fact, I was so excited for the season to come,
That I went looking for seasonal projects for everyone,
And as visions of Pinterest swirled in my head,
I set out to share them, and wrote this for you in bed.

Now queermos! Now ‘straddlers! Now commenters and lurkers!
On crafters and bakers from all faiths and backgrounds!
To the kitchen to cook! To the living room to sew!
Now get on my level! Get festive, you all!

Carmen’s rewrite of The Night Before Christmas via Epic Holigay Grab Bag: 100+ DIY Projects, Recipes, and Inspiration for the Season
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