autostraddle.com tumblr presence — For those of you who need a refresher, the proper...

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For those of you who need a refresher, the proper form to turn someone gay is to make deep eye contact, raise your dominant hand so that it’s level with your temple, and snap. Snap once to turn someone bi, twice to turn them gay, and thrice for grinding in a thong on the Altoids float. To turn someone trans, wiggle your nose like Samantha on Bewitched.