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Are you out there? Is your name still hanging in the closet, or have you pinned it to your diaphragm so it swells with stubborn pride every time you take a breath? Swallow that mouthful of air and hold it for a few seconds longer — do you feel the power of that word pressing against your ribs? It’s been known to rip through guts thicker than yours or mine, but there’s a flush in your cheeks that I’ve seen in my mirror and I think we both know the risk is worth it.

I spend so much time thinking and writing about television, and yet when I pause to think about the times I’ve seen someone like me, a queer Indian woman, I come up with barely anything. There was Kalinda Sharma (played by Archie Panjabi) on The Good Wife, but the show was definitely more interested in developing her relationships with white men than exploring her sexual fluidity. Rebecca Logan (played by Dilshad Vadsaria) had a very short arc on Greek where she was sexually involved with a girl, but it was played mostly for laughs and quickly forgotten.

Sidetrack is a show largely about my life and my experiences, because after years of watching so much television that erased me, I just wanted to write myself in.

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