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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

I read your LJ. Is Matty ok? Are you two still in contact?

i’m not sure
he was ok, for a bit, on medication, getting better but sleepy and
he came to a panel i was on in june 2007
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Krista: So Matty’s MARRIED.
Me: You’re married?
Matty: Yup.
Me: Wow! Congratulations.
Matty: [monotone, unenthused.] Thanks.
Me: When’d you get married?
Matty: Tuesday.
Me: Wow! How’s married life so far?
Matty: Sucks.
Me: Oh! Okay. Um.
Matty: Yeah.
Me: Already?
Matty: Yup.
Me: OK! Um.
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that must have been the last time i saw him in person
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he married a model, they shared a one bedroom downtown, he told me. when i asked him questions he told me he was healthy, but nothing was burning quite as brightly as he’d hoped for or as anyone may.

some time later that year he called me about an urgent business plan that involved selling something imaginary. i answered b/c my friend was missing so I was picking up calls from numbers i didn’t recognize. he wanted me to sell something. i knew there was nothing to sell, just time to kill before he’d go back to the hospital.

he joined facebook and got shot in the foot. i saw the album. he sent me messages about business in washington on a date that caitlin pointed out was obama’s day to get sworn in. he made some comments. he disappeared and returned again. though i haven’t heard anything since. sometimes people feel ashamed.

it’s sad but i have come to realize that with some people there will be times of sickness and times of health. the times of sickness might smash your heart open. that’s the risk you take, or they took; making vows and all that. he last signed on to facebook four months ago. the book of face.

he always thanked me. he was always very grateful. he would introduce me to new people as the girl who saved his life, and though i didn’t believe it, it was something nice to consider

Ask Riese anything

formspring.me
All the tangible stuff–the trees outside, my friends, the weather–fell away. I could physically feel my brain. My body did not exist. I had no skin, no hair, no bones; all desire had converted itself into a cerebral current that reached nothing but my frontal lobe. Lust was something not felt but thought. My brain was devouring all of my other organs and gaining speed with each swallow. There was no outdoors, the sky and wind were irrelevant. There was only the computer screen and the phone, my chair, and maybe a glass of water.
meghan daum, “on the fringes of the physical world.” 1998. the new yorker. (via autowin)
Source: marielynbernard.blogspot.com