“If this was a lesson in musical biology and Bon Iver and Tegan & Sara were to have a baby it would look and sound like Macnaught”via Cute Indie Bands Alert photographed by Stef Mitchell
I wish Heather Hogan wrote for Autostraddle. Is there any way you could make that happen?
YES. I wish that too, dear reader, as Heather is a friend of mine and I love her writing. So let’s talk details!
Here’s what needs to happen, listen up: I need about 100 million dollars. Ok. Can you do that part? I’m super busy. so busy srsly. So. !!! Assuming you get that part done, which shouldn’t be THAT hard, I mean twitter has like a billion dollars right?
Then I am going to buy Viacom!!!!
Then I will be IN CHARGE OF VIACOM.
I will have a mahogany colored antique desk with pictures on it of my sponsor children (i will have 150+ sponsor children).
Then I’ll have a little dog who doesn’t bark too much or shed, but is cute.
THEN I will have a big meeting. I will invite to this meeting everybody who works for Viacom, but only the Logo properties (of which AE is one) will HAVE to attend. BUT HERE’S THE THING – there will be LOTS of mini-sandwiches, and probably also free vodka. So basically, who WOULDN’T come to that kind of party?
The vodka will be delivered by cater-waiters who will all be struggling writers and will all get paid $250 for 2 hours of work, which is like hand-job-level money.
Then there will be a song/dance number AND THEN i will come out – or maybe somebody cuter will come out to deliver the message for me, and the message will be that everyone who works for Logo/etc can also write for Autostraddle.com, aka the little foul-mouthed engine that barely could.
THAT’S THE PLAN do you like it? I like it!
Hey sexy, what are you doing for lunch tomorrow? We’ve put together a handy list of tips and recipes so you can take your own!
Life changes, people grow up, and sometimes magazines catch up with Tegan & Sara and then fold. Here’s 10 magazines we miss like runaway puppies.
The Breakfast Club
The Virgin Suicides
