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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

the girl i like (and hooked up with a month ago) keeps asking for my approval of the guy she’s hooking up with currently. how do i make it not obvious that i don’t approve of her being with someone that’s not me? am i being selfish? he’s a nice guy…

this is a really really SUPER AWESOME FUN POSITION that girls FUCKING LOVE to put you in!!
you say this:
“i want you to be SOSOSOOO FUCKING HAPPY OMG SO HAPPY!!!! but i am also a person! hi! so every time you talk about being with another person, my feelings (I HAVE THEM!) are steamrolled a lil’! so! i support you doing ALL THE THINGS that make you happy – even this guy! but you need to find someone else to discuss him with. i’m here for LITERALLY EVERYTHING ELSE YOU WILL EVER NEED but so help me if you bring up this guy to me one more time i will smash tapioca pudding into your face. HAVE SOME GODDAMN RESPECT FOR MY FEELINGS, AS I HAVE BASICALLY ROLLED OUT THE RED CARPET FOR YOURS.”

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So last weekend I made out with a friend a tiny bit (TEENY TINY BIT) problem is she’s an internet friend and we never see each other irl. How do I broach the topic of wanting to make out more without it sounding like a huge love connection thing? It’s not

GOOD LORD SRSLY. i know that you have the words for this. you can say this to someone, right? you just said it to me. SURELY JESUS CHRIST YOU CAN SAY IT TO HER.
“last weekend was a thing that i liked. want to do it again?”

EASY BAKE OVEN, KIDS. IT’S JUST WORDS.

sorry i am so grumpy i love you i really do.

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where did the kid you have come from? i mean yes, sperm egg yadayada. but were you like heterogay before. and what did you think of the homogays before you blossomed/realized you too were a homogay?

i had sex with a man at least twice. i told him i thought i might be maybe bisexual. i thought i would never ever ever in my life be able to be me. i was resigned to just being whatever i’d become.
then i decided to be me.
i’d thought gays were yet another cool group that i would be unable to penetrate.
i was wrong.

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