Whats with the whole “lesbians dont like bi girls” i dont understand it. Like what why are they so bitchy towards us? WE LIKE GIRLS TOO!
“lesbians like bi girls very much.” -bcw
I feel like I have to choose between being gay and a Christian. But I can’t deny either part of me. Problem is if I come out or get a girlfriend I will be kicked out of my campus ministry and sorority. Hiding and coming out both seem bad. Thoughts for me?
Ok hi. I hate religion so I had to consult my roommate and my girlfriend for their advice for you because their backgrounds are appropriate I think! Ready go:
Your fear of being ostracized or shunned to the point of being exiled from your group is a legit concern. But I think this is also a situation where if you come out and live honestly that you’ll find out who actually loves you for who you are, and who your real friends are through this, those who aren’t afraid to stick with you even despite what others will think.
You have to be true to yourself. But also be ready to accept any reactions you’ll get. People’s reactions will surprise you. There will be people who are totally supportive and they might not be people you expected, which is part of this whole process you have to go through. Which is good! Because you’ll discover who the people are that you should keep in your life – people who believe that God loves us all, including gay people.
If you are rejected by this particular church, this particular group or ministry or sorority doesn’t mean that you have to turn your back on Christianity. It just means that you will need to find a Christian group that accepts and supports you for exactly who you are because they DO exist. So many denominations and communities and groups exist for someone like you. They’re out there.
Ok hi it’s Alex again. I have to add this:
You CAN be christian AND gay. Your sexuality has absolutely nothing to do with your religion. If you believe that God created you, then he created you just exactly the way you are and there was a reason for it. Embrace it and show those people that believe otherwise that they’re wrong because sexuality is not a choice but spirituality and religion sure as hell are.
Also, I’m told that googling “gay christian church” or “gay christian ministry” is a good idea. You’re not the only one dude.
Do people do dumb things in times of grief? Things they may not mean to have done?
oh yeah. exclusively, almost, sometimes.
Can autostraddle have a sex column, kind of like Savage Love? I think everyone would like that.
i thought autostraddle was a sex column?
In keeping with lesbian tradition, I have a thing for my best friend’s ex. The thing is, my best friend is a straight guy who almost stopped talking to me when I came out because he thought I liked her then and he was afraid to lose her to me. Oops.
sometimes the reason that people are afraid of a certain thing happening is because it kinda seems like that thing probably should happen and definitely could happen. you know what i mean?
I feel like we really need to have an open thread about the sleepovers we all had as awkward repressed and/or confused babygays.
my first feeling was “good idea”
and my second feeling was “ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE WE CANNOT TALK ABOUT CHILDREN WANTING TO HAVE SEX WITH OTHER CHILDREN ON OUR WEBSITE”
How do you deal when your experience with someone defined your entire existence, and you want them to know how important they are to you without scaring them away or making them think you’re still in love with them?
why do you want them to know how important they are to you? does your sense of their importance relate to their acknowledgment of it? what i do, or what i would do, is that i write about that person. i write about them forever and ever and they never die and never fade in my mind. maybe they’ve forgotten about me. but i guess that’s not really the point. the point for me is to keep everyone alive and as close to me as possible. like summoning a thing.
CHICAGOSTRADDLE
#tesswasthere
My girlfriend’s best guy friend has a rather dangerous crush on her. he has become super clingy and possessive to her lately, it’s ridiculous and we don’t know what to do, is there any way we can stop it without hurting him too badly? :(
Unfortunately I don’t think there’s a painless approach. If this dude is being controlling / possessive to the point where it makes your girlfriend feel uncomfortable then she needs to tell him to stop. It’s possible that he isn’t aware how inappropriate he’s being, maybe it’ll just be a matter of pointing that out.
It might soften the blow if your girlfriend handles this alone. He’ll probably be less receptive if you get involved.
