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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

How long have you been vegan? What are the benefits you have noticed?

i have been vegan since july, so about nine months? minus occasional guilt trips by my parents that involve minor amounts of dairy. so far the most dramatic health benefit i’ve noticed is that my cholesterol and blood pressure are now REALLY low - this is not actually a benefit for me as they were low to start with, but i imagine for other people it might be good? also, my iron is good, which doesn’t sound like much unless you know that i’ve been anemic for much of my pre-vegan life. maybe it’s because i eat more dark leafy greens now? or vitamins. idk. maybe the biggest change for me has been saving money - i used to be the person who would spend $6 on a block of fancy feta cheese, and now i just have a ton of dried legumes and grains that never go bad and i just buy a little produce to go with my chickpeas/rice/whatever each week and it’s super cheap! which is great.

there may be more good things as well, to be honest my health/lifestyle is such a trainwreck in like every other area (sleeping 3-6 hours a night, eating only one food group for days at a time or forgetting meals or consuming entire jars of biscoff spread, never washing my face ever, forgetting my vitamins, etc) that i probably don’t benefit from it as much as i could. if i slept more and ate better and did yoga maybe i would be like jbeals or something, who knows

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Is it hard to get interviews for AS? I imagine you’re using lesbian connections or cold-calling. Effective methods?

It actually depends. Some interviews were offered to me (Toni Collette, Chely Wright, Laurel Holloman) while others I had to really pursue on my own to get (Jennifer Beals, EZ Girl, Guinevere Turner, Liz Feldman). I’ve made several attempts to get Chris Colfer, Heather Morris, Jane Lynch, Sara Gilbert, Jessica Capshaw, etc) to no avail and it’s incredible frustrating because I have a vested interest in those people and know it would be amazing.

There is actually someone who I’ve been pursuing for a year that may happen any day now, so that will be really satisfying if it happens. But yea, it can sometimes take a lot of work and following up via email with publicists, etc.

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I just came out & guess what -dating girls is not easier just b/c I’m a girl too. I am so lost in this queer dating maze. Am I allowed to switch “who” I am w/r/t being the initiator or not? Is that okay? I need her to know that I’m new to this & I’m sorry

hello and welcome to the wonderful world of being exactly who you are / want to be!!

you’re right - dating girls isn’t easier just b/c you are one. sometimes it’s even harder b/c girls are excellent debaters and they look super sad when they cry. but! i think it’s easier to relate to a girl, so it’s easier to see things from her perspective. but of course, every person is a brand new beast, regardless of gender.

re: switching “who” you are w/r/t initiations, etc — ABSOLUTELY. not only are you allowed, you are encouraged. i mean, sometimes you’re pretty sure you’re not a certain “way,” but mostly you won’t know until you’ve tried. relatedly, she may not know she likes her partner to be a “way” until you do it. in any event, it’s a learning experience. so fun! so much growth!

i find that just saying what you want to say is usually the best approach. so for example: “i don’t really like to restrict myself with labels or rigid definitions. i think i’m still figuring out how to be me, like i just met me. i feel like you’ll be supportive obviously, but i just wanted to say something. ok let’s take off our shirts and eat cupcakes.”

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Laneia. The thing is, I’m more of a serial monogamist. I just ended a 3 year relationship & am pretty excited to be dating again but it kind of freaks me out. Is it okay to be seeing more than one girl at once? I feel guilty to be dividing my attention.

i really, really relate to this. hi! hello twin! yeah, i don’t understand how people see more than one person at a time. i did it for literally one day and felt all nine kinds of icky / had several anxiety attacks over it. i don’t even know if you’re supposed to tell them that you sometimes eat foods / see movies with other people? or if that’s just understood until the moment you have that superfun talk about where your relationship is going and thennn you discuss your other dates? and then you make a decision like the bachelor? i do not understand that world.

i like to just focus on getting to know one girl at a time, which is maybe a bad thing because i have a lot of feelings, so maybe it would be better if i spread them out over a lot of girls instead of just one + my friends. but i think maybe some people are made for casual dating and some people are made for exclusive dating, and i think i am the latter. i mean, i don’t know, is what i’m saying here. i have no idea.

wait, actually, i do think that you should have time between monogamous relationships to reevaluate / meet your new self. maybe that’s what casual dating is?

this question has given me a lot of anxiety.

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(1) i told this boy that i’m (sort of) with two big secrets of mine: that i’m pretty sure i’m bi, and i just got my nipple pierced. i don’t want anyone to ever know either of these things, but certain circumstances forced me to inform him. i don’t really

like him anymore, but i’m afraid that if i tell him i’m not feeling it, he’ll tell people my secrets. (yes, i think he’s the type of person who might do that.) WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO.

—-

i feel like this will sound mean but i honestly don’t mean it that way: i think you are between 15 and 20, and that when i was in that time/place these things also felt like big secrets. but the truth is that ultimately, they aren’t/won’t be. maybe he will tell everyone you know; there might be like 48 hours of embarrassment, but that will be all. (unless you’re in like Iran and being bi is actually dangerous, in which case OH GOD I’M SORRY) . basically i think you should tell this guy to go fuck himself and if he does tell people, they will care more about the fact that he’s clearly a dick than about your nipples.

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I’m acquaintances w/ this woman who I find super attractive and she finds me attractive as well. I have the feeling she works as an escort (not there’s anything wrong with that). How do I tell her I want both of us to get tested before h/u?

i don’t want to say this is a silly question, but i will say that trust me honey sex workers are usually more interested/invested in everyone getting tested than you will ever be. all you have to do is say ‘hey i always make sure that me and a new partner both get tested, just fyi, can we do that?“ and she will say yes. if you say it to her the way you phrased in this question - i.e. this is probably a big deal to you/not something you were considering, she may hear "because you are a giant sack of std’s for whom sexual health is not a priority.” which kind of calls into question your “not that there’s anything wrong with that.” she may be offended! and i would not blame her.

also just fyi she’s probably one of the safer people you will ever have sex with anyways, because generally sex workers are both president and member of the Always Safe Sex club.

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