SHE IS SUCH A LESBIAN OH MY GOD
rachel can you sometime in the next few months (aka before february) do a huge recap of everything obama’s done? bc everything in my head is like yay lgbt rights but wtf pre-67 israel borders, healthcare debt immigration rawr rawr rawr, you know?
i just almost had an anxiety attack even thinking about trying to write that
i’ll make a deal with you, i’ll write it if you’ll find someone to explain it to me first
“Leah Dieterich’s mother always told her to write thank you notes. So she does.”
thoughts about the aesthetic and practicality factors of boywallets versus ladywallets, O vegabond?
I don’t know. I can probably learn more about these things from you because I put my money, credit cards and ID straight into my pocket. Bam.
my bro keeps referring to me being a les as ‘your situation.’ It’s gotta be hard to go from phobic -> having a gay sis but he’s known for 6+ mos. we’ll talk about his girl toys but never mine. I’ve tried adding jokes etc. subtly, but nothing is working.
i think people push you as far as you let them
i’m gonna tell you what i think you can do – not because this is your fault, but because i have a feeling you’re the only one of the two of you who thinks there’s anything wrong with this “situation” so you’re gonna have to do the heavy lifting.
see – we make these little social contracts with everyone in our lives, constantly, every day, and the one you have with your brother is that because you understand/feel that it’s “hard to go from ‘phobic –> having a gay sis,” you’re not expecting him to have interest in your life or actually accept who you are. he’s been exempted from the courtesy/interest he ought to extend to his sister.
he’s not the one who’s gonna break that contract – from his perspective, opening up to your subtle jokes is condoning homosexuality or letting you win or suggesting he’s totally okay with it when it seems like he isn’t. it would be a tremendously meaningful gesture, the kind parents sometimes make on teevee shows about gay kids which make us cry.
it’s time for you to change the contract. talk about your 'girl toys’. just do it. just start talking honestly about your life. either he can back out of the deal altogether – in which case i’d give him some time to come around – express discomfort but eventually be forced to deal with it, or reluctantly agree to the new terms. sooner or later he will.
your reluctance to assert yourself can feed into his conception that your sexuality is shameful, because even you 'know better’ then to talk about that stuff around him. you know? when he says “your situation”, correct him.
i know things are complicated with families but homophobia isn’t a thing you should have to tiptoe around all your life, it’s something you need to punch in the throat.
how do I change the picture on my Autostraddle profile thing? It said to set-up Gravatar, which I have done - and I’ve followed all the steps, but nothing thus far, has happened..help?
it takes a while to make the change, check again tomorrow
Ive been waiting for this day for over a year. I really dont know what i would have done if on those nights i wanted to hurt myself i didn’t have autostraddle. i might of not made it to today. your doing an amazing thing Riese. Thank you.
thank you for not hurting yourself. you’re doing an amazing thing, too.