because you don’t know a stranger
and the stranger doesn’t know you
and you’ve never seen them before
and you’ll never see them again
just don’t take candy from them
trust me on that one
you should tell her about the cooties boys have, it’s serious
get drunk and “accidentally” knock it on the ground so it explodes – DO THIS WHEN SHE IS NOT HOME – i know – it’s gonna be intense to handle that smell in that abundance, but it’s the means to an end, okay? then when she comes home either:
a) gift her with a new perfume that smells better to apologize for breaking hers, like give it to her when she gets home and discovers the broken perfume, and act really sorry to the point where she feels like she has to wear what you got her
b) complain about the smell being terrible in such abundance – its’ on the floor now, not on her, so it’s back to being fair game. and if she’s like “but i wear that” you should be like “really? ok, you have to try [x]”
in 7th grade me and amelia and becky went to the store in the mall where they’d make custom perfumes for you – and this is funny because in my actual life right now i am OBSESSED with how things smell and have a hyper-sensitive sense of smell – and i don’t know, somehow i ended up with one called “tea rose” because i think i just liked tea a lot, and amelia and becky told me within like a day that that shit smelled like an old lady and i am very grateful to them. i switched to the body shop’s fuzzy peach and then graduated to tommy girl.
i feel like jk rowling is not a wizard
just for you i will make sure that at least one article tomorrow is a you need help article.
BAM.
i think you should just be friends or yoga buddies
she has a wife
that’s serious
laptops, cellphones, ipods, wallets and bicycle helmets have been popular locations.
http://www.autostraddle.com/lesbian-how-to-get-date-pick-up-girls-19152/
http://www.autostraddle.com/steps-every-queer-can-take-to-improve-chances-of-getting-laid-54020/
http://www.autostraddle.com/lesbian-courtship-55145/
http://www.autostraddle.com/how-to-meet-other-queers-63456/
http://www.autostraddle.com/tag/how-to-be-gay
did you like it? i actually totally hated it, except for the west side story parts, is that going to be an unpopular opinion
