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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

My brother bought me a beautiful necklace from Swarovski but I tend to swing on the more tomboi side. I want to wear the necklace but it doesn’t suit my style at all. Advice? Tips?

I’m not sure if you want to wear the necklace because you want your brother to know you appreciate it or because you actually like it.

To the former, you’re not obligated to wear jewelry just because someone buys it for you. In fact, by wearing it you would be encouraging more jewelry like it. You could even make up an excuse to your brother like, “I really like this but wearing necklaces catches the hair at the nape of my neck. How would you feel if I exchanged it for this cool skull keychain I saw on the Swarovski website?”

On the other hand, if you like the jewelry you’re just not sure how to wear it, that’s a little hard for me to say without seeing the necklace. Generally speaking with any jewelry, I find that it’s easiest to work in a necklace when wearing a scoope, crew or V-neck solid colored shirt or sweater. Maybe experiment with this the next time you have something dressy to go to. Try some nice pants, a sweater and the necklace. Your clothes don’t have to be feminine or tightly fitting to look cool with a necklace. In fact, the contrast can be kind of cool.

Ask me about queer fashion/style/clothes/shopping/feelings

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I have got it bad, and of course I feel the need to tell all of the people. But my crush IDs as nonbinary and prefers not to use gendered pronouns. How do I squeal about their adorableness to my friends without outing them as trans?

ok i answered this but then bcw called me to tell me that:
1. someone she was working with for 6 hours today apparently thought bcw was a guy the entire time and maybe still does
2. i answered this question wrong.

WHAT A FUN DAY FOR GENDER

um, i guess the thing is that i don’t understand your situation. i feel old maybe.

if someone wants everyone to call them “ze”, for example, then that person must be out as a “ze”-pronouned person. because you can’t expect everyone to call you “ze” if you’re keeping your ze-ness on the DL.

if a person is keeping their ze-ness on the DL, then they certainly wouldn’t expect everybody to refer to them as “ze.”

bcw said that with my answer, i was assuming that the crush insisted upon not-being-out-as-trans AND wanting-gender-neutral pronouns. which is true, i did assume that, because if that person isn’t insisting on those two things, then i don’t understand why you’d ask me this question to begin with.

bcw suggested that perhaps you are just trying to be good and politically correct and respectful, and i independently concluded that since i am none of those things, i cannot understand where you are coming from. JK I’M GOOD.

no but um, she says that you should say to this person “hey you came up the other day when i was talking about [something innocuous – like "the coffee shop where you work” or “that movie we saw last week”] and it occurred to me that i don’t know how you like to be referred to/how out you want to be to people you don’t know?“

and the person will probably be pleased as punch to answer.

Ask Riese a brand new thing

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halfway through 19. crippling Jonah Complex. talking to a therapist. still cripplingly lazy. can i just major in slacking? this feels bad, but moving, doing, being, writing, thinking… feels almost worse.

here’s a quote i like:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? […] Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. […] It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

-Marianne Williamson via Do The Work!
http://howtopronouncelaneia.tumblr.com/post/10184193298

Ask Laneia something small or large

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i just turned 19 and decided to leave my family and become independent. it’s scary. what can i do to make myself feel better?

riese and i agree that peanut butter is a good place to start. after that, i think you should find the nearest park with a good view of the sky and go there with a book, a notebook, a pen and an ipod and just see what that’s like. 19 is a neat year.

Ask Laneia something small or large

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Have you ever been on the computer for so long that when you logged off you kinda forgot that you didn’t have a mouse or a keyboard in your hand for real life?

i’ve had trouble lately with command-z
while working on [secret project] i kept cutting things incorrectly, like i’d cut off the edges of words or something, and i was very frustrated that i couldn’t just undo it and try again, that i actually had to start all over

Ask Riese a brand new thing

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Do you know how many times Batwoman issue #4 passes the Bechdel test? Five million and a gold star many times. Crime-fighting women not running around wearing stilettos many times. Female characters not being introduced by an ass-shot many times. Women not standing in awkward tit-and-ass shots many times. Gay women having sex and sweetly making out in a way that is not creepy-old-man voyeuristic many times. What I mean here is many, many times, guys.
Autostraddle — Batwoman #4: Smart, Feminist and Very Very Lesbosexy
Source: autostraddle.com

do you have a southern accent?

yes, but only when i am a) drunk as a skunk or b) really angry (rare, happily)

i am currently in kentucky working on re-cultivating it. though it reportedly is more of an ambiguously southern drawl and not a kentucky, georgia, or texas accent. (the three southern states where i’ve lived the longest)

i think it’s more fun to talk with my accent and I WANT IT BACK

Ask Taylor anything

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What was your major in college? Is this always what you have wanted to do? Is there still something you want to be “when you grow up?”

english with honors in creative writing
i wanted to be a magazine editor i think
i’ve wanted to be a lot of things over the years
but that’s the one that stands out
w/r/t college-age ambitions

so yes, i want to do this
and all the other elements of “this” we haven’t done yet
but that exist in my mind as ideas
i want to do this but with money
and i want to write a book or two or three

Ask Riese a brand new thing

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